Finding harmony in cancer recovery

Yoga is the practice of bringing the body, mind, and spirit into harmony.

I saw this quote attributed to Thich Nhat Hanh in one place on the internet, but I’m not certain that he said it, as I was not able to find it so referenced in other sources, and I usually think of him as talking much more about mindfulness, meditation, and loving kindness – not so much about yoga. In any case, I love the expression, whoever said it. And I love Thich Nhat Hanh for all of his gentle wisdom.

I use the word balance a lot, and of course in yoga this is sometimes referring to physically balancing on one leg, or balancing the body in some certain position in space… but I’m also usually alluding to a deeper balance within the systems of the body -particularly the nervous system, or to the balance between effort and ease, or to balance, or equanimity, in the mind. But this quote got me thinking about the word harmony as a related, though not identical, concept. To me, the word harmony suggests a coming together, or combining of things into a balanced unit, so it is a bit like balance… but harmony also carries additional qualities. That the parts that are coming together, or coming into balance, integrate synergistically, AND that the combined result has a pleasing quality to it. So it’s kinda like balance, but even better!

Some yoga poses, including the one in the image (sometimes called humble flamingo), require a lot of balance, or harmony, in the body and mind. Some muscles engage intensely, while others must relax and stretch. There might be an unusual shifting of body weight that requires a leap of faith in the body and mind, trusting that our bodies can hold us and our heavy backside won’t come crashing down. And often we must regulate our breathing to help the body and mind maintain this complex dance between strength and grace. So yoga is the perfect practice for training us to find that harmony, in which multiple moving parts collaborate to create something truly special. We navigate the sometimes uncomfortable edges, while staying anchored in to our calm breath, and we find that beautiful place where all of the parts unite to create a result that feels so pleasing to body and mind. And I want to emphasize that this harmony is irrespective of what the pose looks like to someone else. What matters is what it feels like to you. That it feels pleasing and harmonious, like the embodiment of the sound of the Eagles singing Peaceful Easy Feeling.

Maybe I’m drawn to these concepts because during the hardest parts of my cancer treatment, I longed so much for a peaceful easy feeling, for harmony in my body, mind, and spirit. While I felt instead like some kind of bombed out war-zone in an alternate universe. And I have heard many other cancer survivors describe a similar feeling – sortof the opposite of harmony. Feeling disconnected, dazed, scattered, frazzled, out of alignment, and out of control. And I think there are a lot of reasons for this – cancer diagnosis and treatment are true shocks to our system, throwing us into a literal fight or flight situation, hormones and other chemicals in the body go haywire, fear and stress hijack our mental clarity and our other normal body processes, our minds try to block out the pain or betrayal we feel toward our bodies, so much is unknown, and we truly question our vitality and our whole existence. In other words, so many of our systems are not functioning optimally, so it’s nearly impossible for them to work together in harmony.

Fortunately, it isn’t usually quite that challenging forever, and we can often begin to find some footing once we know what our treatment will look like, in general what to expect, and for how long. Of course, even then there are often curveballs and new obstacles along the way that can throw us out of balance once again. But with the help of practices like mindfulness and yoga, I believe it is so much easier to truly thrive. To be able to more easily find that balance, to bring the body, mind, and spirit into harmony. EVEN in the midst of the ever-changing cancer journey. And this is because these practices train our bodies to function harmoniously deep within. They train our nervous system to more quickly regain balance after a stressor. And this creates fertile ground for all of the other body systems to come back into harmony. Once our bodies, minds, and spirits come back into this place of harmony, not only do we FEEL better, but all of our systems, individually AND collectively, can function better!

So keep practicing! And if you are new to either yoga or mindfulness and you would like some guidance on how to bring these practices in to your own cancer journey, please reach out!

Have a peaceful, easy day!

Namaste

Surfing the edges in cancer recovery

Have you ever heard the phrase “surfing the edges”? I just finished an incredible book called Yoga Beyond Belief, by Ganga White, and I learned about this phrase there. I was using it as a theme in my community vinyasa class yesterday morning, and then was thinking about how relevant it is to other aspects of our lives off the mat. And maybe even especially for those of us in cancer treatment or recovery.

So surfing the edges has to do with navigating different levels, or “edges”, of intensity or engagement in yoga postures and practice. For example, working at our edge refers to our maximum edge, or that place of effort at which we could not go any further without exhaustion, pain, or potential injury. Our minimum edge, on the other hand, refers to that place on the continuum of effort at which we very first start to feel some resistance or exertion. And the intermediate edge is midway between those points, and there are all variations of edges in between.

In another level of complexity, White describes various types of edges that we might explore, including edges of strength, flexibility, balance, endurance, fear, and pain. I found this list particularly interesting for cancer survivors, as we face our own sorts of challenges in all of these realms on most days.

Back to the general idea, the point is that yoga is a practice in which we don’t always need to operate at our maximum edge, unlike some other forms of exercise or sport. In fact there is much growth and benefit to be had by operating somewhere between our minimum and maximum edges. While there are advantages to sometimes pushing ourselves to our max edge to see where we can go, there is also much to be discovered at an 80% edge or a 50% edge, where we can use more energy exploring alignment or endurance or focusing on the INNER EXPERIENCE of the practice. As White mentions, working at a lesser edge can also increase the level of enjoyment and ease we feel in our practice, which is another important type of edge.

I capitalized inner experience in the last paragraph, as I think this is a huge key to unlocking some of the gifts of yoga. Becoming aware of our inner experience on the mat is an amazing mindfulness practice that trains us to be more aware of our inner experience off the mat. And becoming aware of our inner experience is the first step in cultivating true balance in our bodies and our lives. If we don’t even realize we are off balance, how would we right ourselves? Once we learn to tune in, and we observe how our bodies and minds feel as we play with these various edges, we can learn so much and really feel our way into balance.

We live in such a fast paced, achievement-focused world, that it is easy to tend to operate at our max edge, or sometimes even beyond it, always trying to do more. AND we judge ourselves harshly if we can’t keep up this pace. Sadly this mindset often results in burnout and exhaustion. Learning to explore our other edges and really see, on each new day, what edge feels best and most nourishing is a deep practice in self-compassion. Some days we may feel energetic and amazing, and on those days maybe we do explore that max edge, to see if we can push ourselves to become stronger or more flexible. But on other days, we need to learn to be content with and committed to working near those other edges, not judging ourselves for not being at max capacity 24/7, and loving and respecting ourselves no matter what level we find ourselves in each day.

As I was thinking about this practice of surfing the edges, I realized that it translates beautifully into a new area of exercise I recently picked up, called hill walking. I have found myself really having to adjust my walks day to day depending on how I’m feeling. Some days I feel amazing and can push for a little more speed or a little longer distance. Some days my legs feel heavy or my breath less efficient, so I feel myself needing to back off. And honestly, I think I learn more on those challenging days, when I really have to cut myself some slack, slow down, and bring my focus back to my breath and to finding balance.

And we can bring this theory into so many aspects of our lives. This is especially important as we are going through cancer treatment or healing from treatment, which places so many new stressors on our bodies and our minds. We can surf the edges of productivity in our jobs. Some days we rock and get all sorts of things done, and some days we need to just look out the window. We can surf the edges of how we use our mental and emotional energy with others. Some days we feel social and engaged and want to do all the activities, and some days we need to just veg out by ourselves and not talk to anyone. You get the idea.

So, both on your mat, and off, I invite you to explore this idea of surfing the edges. Notice when you feel yourself pushing to the max, or when you’re not even feeling like the min, and consider that much of the time, there may be much to learn somewhere in between. If you just tune in and listen, your own body and mind will teach you how to most effectively ride the waves with balance and joy.

(Incredible paddleboarding pic of my friend Lori, a 3 time cancer thriver, at my very first yoga for breast cancer retreat in Puerto Vallarta almost 5 years ago! I love the strength and joy in her body language.)

Namaste