Blog

Finding beauty in the clouds

Ever notice how the cloudy skies produce the prettiest and richest sunsets? So too, in life, sometimes things that seem negative or undesirable on the surface can wind up, unexpectedly, resulting in great opportunity and our biggest growth.

Yoga philosophy (in Patanjali’s 8 Limbs of Yoga) teaches us to train ourselves in non-attachment (aparigraha) and contentment (santosha), among other things. If we can learn to be less attached to how we think things should be, and instead learn to find contentment in whatever our circumstances happen to be, we can eliminate much of our suffering, opening ourselves up to discovering those unexpected beauties and those opportunities we never thought existed before we opened our minds.

Having cancer seems like pretty much a negative thing on the surface. BUT, as many cancer survivors relate, it can actually turn into some very positive outcomes, if we just re-frame our minds, using guides like non-attachment and contentment. We can learn to appreciate more, to prioritize better, to not let trivialities disturb our peace, to love more, to spend more time cultivating joy, to be more compassionate with ourselves and others, and to take better care of ourselves – in body, mind, and spirit.

With this mindset, each and every moment carries with it its own beauty, richness, and blessings. And therefore each and every moment nourishes us and supports us in our growth and transformation on this journey of life. So soak up those clouds, my beautiful friends, and all the color they bring.

Namaste

Finding stillness in the breast cancer storm

Lao tzu said “To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders”. Before I found yoga, I don’t think I ever even knew what the word stillness meant. There wasn’t much time for stillness in my life, or so I thought. Between long busy hours in the office and the hospital, driving to and from work, meetings after work, trying to get some exercise, drinking enough water, running errands, spending time with my hubs and rarely my girlfriends, there just really wasn’t much time for anything else but sleep. I literally cut my own hair for years because I didn’t want to take the time to go to a salon! LOL, it wasn’t pretty. Imagine a hamster on a wheel. And I actually thought that if I was being still, I was wasting time that could be spent actually accomplishing something “important”. I’m pretty sure I am not the only one who felt this way. It is common in our culture to always be doing, running, achieving. And if we aren’t constantly doing something, then we either feel lazy or like we are missing out on something fun. Then throw cancer into the mix, with the appointments and treatments and everything else that is required of us, and wow, there is even less time for stillness. Or so I thought.

Yoga and yoga philosophy (and actually my cancer experience too, now that I think about it!) opened my eyes to the fact that when we allow ourselves to run, run, run, in this epidemic of busy-ness as it is sometimes called, we are cutting ourselves off from so much. We are actually missing much of the richness of life, the beautiful texture of the little moments, the simple joys hidden in each experience, the glory of nature or the smile of a loved one, the true bliss of just being ourselves. If we are constantly thinking about and/or running off to the next moment, the next accomplishment, or the next thing to mark off of our list, all of these beautiful little still moments of presence are lost. Talk about a waste!

Importantly, it is in the stillness, in these moments of just being, that our bodies and minds can rest, relax, heal, and regain balance from whatever challenges our lives have brought. Without that stillness, we remain in that vicious cycle of stress, tension, and disequilibrium that is SO unhealthy. And we, as breast cancer survivors, need to heal and restore harmony and balance as much as anyone! Having cancer sort of forced me to be still at times, because I just really didn’t feel well enough to do anything else. And I consider this such an important gift from my cancer experience; learning that it is not just ok, but tremendously important, to put down my desire to run and do, and instead just be. So now, I make stillness a priority. I always begin my yoga practice with settling in to find that place of stillness. And I try to revisit that place throughout my days, as often as I can.

What I eventually learned is that we can learn to choose. Once we recognize the profound importance of stillness, and of really relishing those moments of just being, we can actually choose NOT to let ourselves get swept up in constantly running and doing. We can change our commitments, our schedules, and our priorities to make the time for stillness and present moment awareness. We can make time for yoga, or meditation, or walking in nature, or just spending time with loved ones really being together and soaking up all of those beautiful little moments. For many of us, we will still have busy lives with work and family and responsibilities. But if we can just take a few minutes for stillness here and there, I think we’ll find we really love how it makes us feel. Just take a few minutes and look away from your computer screen and out the window at a beautiful tree or a blue sky, listen to the birds, and just feel your breath. Breaking up a busy work day with just a few short interludes of stillness will help tremendously, and give your body and mind a break to enter into that relaxation response where deep healing can take place. And as we learn to practice stillness, we will be better and better able to shift into that place with ease whenever we want to. As with everything, it just takes practice.

I’ll meet you on the mat to practice finding our stillness.

Namaste

Book review time, again

This is another book that you absolutely must read, if you are a cancer survivor interested in learning how you can take control of your situation, or at least how you respond to your situation. And as we know, we cannot control the outside world. All we can control is how we respond to the outside world. But in this control over our response lies our power. AND, in this response lies the key to whether our cancer experience continues to be stressful, painful, and full of suffering, or whether we can transform that experience into one of peaceful acceptance, growth, resilience, grace, and joy — despite the difficulties that cancer brings.

Mindfulness Based Cancer Recovery is concise and easy to understand, but at the same time a profound and potentially life-changing manual on how we, as cancer survivors, can learn to use mindfulness practices like meditation and yoga to help us navigate this difficult experience. The authors do a beautiful job of describing how most of us react to stressful situations, like cancer, with fear, panic, and anger, and how this stimulates the stress response in our bodies and minds, starting us into a vicious cycle of maladaptive coping and negative emotions that just make things worse. Alternatively, they describe the possibility of responding to stressors with awareness and clarity, which allows us to recognize that stress response when it begins, and then engage healthier maneuvers to counteract it with the relaxation response. This then stops the vicious cycle of negativity in its tracks, promotes healthier physiological conditions in the body, and gives us the power to choose better coping strategies and move forward with balance and equanimity.

The book then gives us step by step instructions on how to achieve this new way of responding. Their program is an 8 week system, in which you learn a number of mindfulness techniques, yoga, breathing, and more. They relate some of the research that has documented this program’s success in helping cancer survivors feel better, have less mood disturbance, less stress, more energy/vigor, and more mental clarity. Who doesn’t want all of that?! All it takes is putting in the effort and time to develop these skills ourselves.

Mindfulness Based Cancer Recovery (MBCR) is a similar program to Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). If you love this material, I also recommend his book “Full Catastrophe Living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain, and illness”. It is a much longer and more detailed work, so it takes a bit longer to read. If you prefer more formal structure, there are MBSR programs in many cities around the world, where you are led through the program with trained teachers.

Finally, as you may have realized, most of the techniques that are used in MBCR and MBSR are very similar to those of the traditional 8 Limbs of Yoga, as set out by Patanjali, and now practiced by millions around the globe. These 8 Limbs of Yoga are what guide my practice and my teachings, so you will learn many of the same strategies here at Yoga with Leona. Please check out the books, keep practicing with us, and see for yourself how these practices impact your life for the better.

Namaste

Clarity with Inner Peace

Often in a yoga class, the teacher will say at the beginning of class “Set your intention for the practice”, and I think this is a great way to focus your mind on something that is important to you, rather than letting the mind run off on your grocery list, or what you should have said to that jerk who was argumentative with you yesterday, or whatever other wild stuff our minds tend to do. We are taught to set the intention in the present (ie “I am xxxxxx”, rather than “I will be xxxxx”), to just go ahead and bring it to life in the now, rather than imagining something that might happen in the future. And of course, you can choose any intention you want, be it “I am healthy”, “I am resilient”, “I am content in the now”, “I am loving awareness”, “Abundance flows to me”, “I trust in the universe”, or whatever speaks to you. You choose what you want to embody, and then you use the energy of the practice and your focus during the practice to help make it so.

For me, pretty much every time I hear “Set your intention”, the word PEACE is what comes to me. Inner peace seems to be the thing that I hope the cultivate the most. Of course, other intentions come up occasionally, but “I am peaceful” is far and away the most common. Inner peace, to me, carries with it so many things that I want to develop more of in my life. As Rumi says in the quote in the photo, when we develop inner peace, allowing the waters to settle, an intense clarity comes along with it. This clarity helps us see things as they are, without all of our emotional overtones clouding or distorting the truth. And it also helps us to see the big truths, like the moon and stars mirrored in our own being, rather than just staying stuck in the weeds of small thoughts and concerns. And of course, seeing the big truths with clarity will help us to know what we truly want out of life and how to get there.

This image of settled water and clarity, or clear reflections off of still water, is used often, and I find it a great analogy to our human predicament. When we are stirred up and agitated, of course we can’t see or think clearly because our emotions and thoughts don’t allow it. But if we can take a few deep breaths, and find that space of inner peace, often we see the situation in a completely new light, finding clear and easy solutions to our questions that, before, were really stumping us.

One could also think of the concept of inner peace and how that state affects our nervous system. You know I’m fascinated by the phenomenon of sympathetic system overdrive (which happens with chronic stress) and all of the bad things that happen in our bodies with that (chronic inflammation, cardiovascular disease, mood disorders, immune system dysfunction, and on and on). Sympathetic overdrive would be analogous to a turbid, stormy sea, with big waves disrupting the stillness of the water. The parasympathetic system, on the other hand, is active and balancing out that sympathetic activity when we are in a state of inner peace, when the storm calms and the waters settle. And when the parasympathetic system can achieve this balance, the body has the clarity to heal itself.

And finally, maybe in the simplest terms, I just feel better when I am able to cultivate this sense of inner peace. It just doesn’t feel good to be agitated, stressed, angry, fearful, and disturbed. So why would we allow ourselves to stay in those places if we had the choice. And fortunately, most of the time, we DO have a choice. We may not realize it when we are in the midst of some upset. But we can learn to notice quickly when we get off track, and to respond calmly and intelligently to right our own course. (See the video on Meditation to learn more about programs like Mindfulness Based Cancer Recovery and how they teach us to do this).

In summary, cancer and cancer treatment sure can feel like a huge never-ending tsunami, which distorts and agitates the water of our being. But we can learn to restore inner peace and tranquility, stillness to our waters. And this inner peace will help us have more clarity of mind, to be physiologically healthier in our bodies, to heal, and to just feel better. Yoga can help us get there. See you on the mat.

Book review time

Ok y’all, I’ve been thinking I wanted to share with you a few of my favorite books. So of course, I felt like I had to start with this one! This comprehensive and easy to understand book was written by Tari Prinster, the founder of Y4C, or Yoga 4 Cancer, with whom I trained last year. You can find it on Amazon. I also highly recommend checking out their website, which is packed with great information, as well as a directory of Y4C trained yoga teachers across the world.

Tari is a breast cancer survivor herself, and so understands all of the challenges we face firsthand. She demonstrates profound compassion and understanding, and shares some personal accounts of the inner emotional experience of having cancer that many of us will identify with, and has helpful advice on how to traverse the experience in healthier ways. She has been teaching yoga to cancer survivors now for more than a decade, and has called on medical experts in different fields to help her develop the program in a truly scientific manner. Based in a deep understanding of what happens in the body with cancer and cancer treatments, her program is specifically designed to help cancer survivors receive the benefits of yoga in a safe and effective manner. She is very cautious in providing clear instructions for beginners, so that they may learn to practice safely, taking into account whatever physical limitations they may have from treatment (or for other unrelated reasons). BUT (and this is one of my favorite things about her), she also encourages cancer survivors to know that they can work up to a strong and vigorous practice if that is what they want. She empowers survivors to continue to build strength and flexibility, not just believing that all we can ever do is gentle yoga because of our cancer history. The book provides many illustrations of different postures, including a number of different sample practice sequences designed for different times in your treatment and recovery. She also explains a lot of the science and biology behind how and why yoga is particularly beneficial to cancer survivors, which helps immensely in understanding what the practice is doing for us on a deep level.

In summary, I believe every cancer survivor should read this book and consider how yoga might help them in coping with the effects of the disease and treatment. Whether you are young or old, fit or not, have a prior yoga practice or not, and whatever stage or type of cancer you have, you will learn important information in this book that will help you take some control of your situation and harness the power of these ancient healing practices.

Namaste

Flexibility in Life

I love this quote from BKS Iyengar, in which he says “The flexibility we gain in asana is the living symbol of the suppleness we gain in relation to life’s problems and challenges”. I love it because it gets at one of the biggest ways I think yoga practice helps us. Yes, of course the physical benefits of yoga are really important, especially for cancer survivors. And I am VERY grateful for the benefits that yoga has brought to my body: helping to reduce tightness and pain in my chest from surgery and radiation, returning range of motion to my shoulder, and building strength and flexibility in my back to eradicate my long standing low back pain (just to mention a few).

BUT, more importantly, I am grateful for my yoga practice and how it has helped me mentally, to be more flexible in life. Yoga practice has taught me to loosen my need to control everything (which obviously we can’t do, so why bang our heads against a wall trying), to be more open to whatever the present moment brings me, to not fear change but embrace it, to in fact find contentment and curiosity in the midst of that change, to navigate those changes with minimal tension and stress, and to trust that whatever is happening carries with it some lesson that will help me build grace and grow along my path. I would have never guessed, when I started my yoga journey nearly 10 years ago, that this practice would have such profound effects on my entire being. I started the practice, like most people, for the physical benefits. And yes indeed, the physical benefits are huge. I am physically in the best shape of my life, thanks to my yoga practice. But more importantly, I feel mentally as healthy and strong as I have ever been, with a sense of peace and joy overflowing most of my days. That’s not to say that I don’t have my moments. Of course I do. But I feel so much more aware and adaptable, and able to catch myself quickly and correct course when I lose my cool.

I hope that you will find similar benefits with your yoga practice. Just breathe deeply, keep yourself focused in the present moment, be patient, and trust in yourself and in the practice.

Namaste

(and if you are new to the yoga world, we often say “namaste” at the end of practice or when greeting one another. It means this “I honor that place in you in which the entire universe dwells, I honor that place in you which is of love, of light, of peace, and of truth. When you are in that place in you, and I am in that place in me, we are one.” It is a beautiful way to show reverence for one another, to recognize ourselves in one another, and to truly understand our commonality and the beauty and perfection of our true nature.)

I’m getting SO excited!

I am getting very close to being ready to officially launch YogawithLeona! And I am so excited, I am almost flying! Almost, LOL. I have been busy filming videos to complete the baseline library I wanted to create before opening the website up for memberships. I just have a few more to film, and then will send out some invites for a soft launch. I will continue to film and upload more new asana practices each month, so stay tuned as the library continues to grow. I’ve got some new technology on the way too, to hopefully make the sound quality a little better and smoother for future videos!

As you can see if you have had a look at the shop, there are individual videos available to purchase. BUT, I highly recommend the membership option instead! This will give you unlimited access to ALL of the videos for 1 year. And then if you love the material, and want to keep practicing with me, subsequent years’ subscriptions will come at a discounted price. Also, I would love to have your feedback. If there are certain types of videos you would like more of, or you have other such requests, please send me an email! This site is for YOU! I am here to share what I have learned about yoga in my own breast cancer journey, so that it might also help you in yours.

Thank you all for your support. And thank you for giving yourself the tools that it takes to overcome any obstacles that breast cancer may have put in your way. We are strong, resilient, amazing beings! And yoga can help that light shine even stronger.

As BKS Iyengar said, “Don’t practice for cosmetic beauty. Practice for cosmic beauty. Practice for inner beauty and inner light”. Let that light shine bright!

Nov 2019 Yoga for Breast Cancer Retreat

Sometimes in life, you just get blown away by how beautifully things can turn out. This year’s Yoga for Breast Cancer Retreat was one of those times. This group of amazing breast cancer survivors, and a few of our support people, gathered in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico to relax, restore ourselves, learn about and practice yoga, support one another, delight in nature’s beauty, share stories, empower one another, and heal ourselves in body, mind, and spirit.  We also had a few margaritas, a lot of laughs, and some fun adventures. It was truly moving to see the love and support shared by this beautifully varied group of people. We all have different stories, different stages of cancer, different treatments, different physical abilities, different backgrounds, and are in different places and stages of our lives outside of cancer. But we all came together, listened, and offered what we could to each and every other member of the group. My heart honestly just swells a little, even now a month later, as I think about it and look back over the photos (just part of the group pictured here, see the slideshow on my homepage for more!).

As another cancer survivor friend of mine said recently, the Cancer Club sure isn’t one you want to join willingly.  But once you become a member, there is something really special about how we rally around one another, offering advice, support, or maybe just a hug and some understanding. We all recognize something of ourselves in one another, and true compassion springs forth from there. Perhaps we remember when we were in the same difficult situation waiting for test results, or we recall having those same side effects, or those same fears and stressors. Our differences melt away, and we see another beautiful soul going through a shared experience. Cancer, as shitty as it is, is a great equalizer. No matter how rich, beautiful, famous, or talented you are, cancer and cancer treatments affect us all deeply as human beings and human bodies, without much regard for all of those things that we sometimes think are what define us and that can divide us if we let them. In the face of a cancer experience, our differences pale in comparison to our commonalities, and we feel a fellowship and a camaraderie with those around us.

Interestingly, a very similar thing happens in yoga. Yoga practice teaches us compassion and understanding of ourselves (through practice of the yamas and niyamas, asana, and really all of the 8 limbs), which then develops naturally into compassion and understanding of others, and a recognition of our oneness with all beings. Sadhguru (an Indian yogi, teacher and philosopher) said “If you can break the illusion that you are separate, and begin to experience the oneness of existence, that is yoga”. This is, of course, referring to yoga as a state of being (not as just the physical asana practice part of yoga), to yoga as a state of union and oneness with the universe.

So in a weird way, cancer can be the catalyst that nudges us into a state of yoga, opening our hearts and minds to oneness and connecting us to others and to all of life’s experiences. And what magic ensues when that occurs! That is the magic that I felt at our retreat, with all of these beautiful people.

As Ram Dass says, “we’re all just walking each other home”.  I love walking with all of my gorgeous, loving, and awe-inspiring cancer-surviving sisters!

Mastery of fear

Buckle up, this is a long one. This month marks three years since I started treatment for my stage 3a HER2+ breast cancer. It is confusing to think about my “cancer free” interval, as I had 4.5 months of chemo before my surgery, and at surgery the cancer was all dead, so who knows when exactly I was “cancer free”?! So I count from diagnosis. Just over 3 years.

Fear sucks, but unfortunately is a reality for cancer survivors. The good news is we can learn to overcome our fears, to master our fears, to be courageous, if we just find the right tools.

This summer I had a recurrence scare after some routine follow up imaging showed suspicious nodules in my lung and liver. I had previously had PET/CT, CT scans, and plain chest xrays, but we decided to do an ultrasound of my liver and another plain chest xray as routine follow up this year, just because they are cheper and easier than PET/CT (for which I have to drive 5 hours to Guadalajara).  Interpreting an ultrasound of my liver is difficult, as I have many cysts (which have been previously seen on all of my imaging), but this summer’s ultrasound described two small solid nodules of unclear etiology that had not been seen before. This summer’s chest xray also showed a small solid nodule that had not been seen before. So for anyone who knows anything about cancer, you’ll know these imaging reports scared the shit out of me. Any newly identified solid nodule in a breast cancer survivor is concerning for metastatic disease, meaning the cancer has recurred and spread to those locations. I had bloodwork at the same time, which showed mildly abnormal liver function, but normal breast cancer tumor markers.

At the time I received these results, I was feeling great, practicing yoga every day, seemingly getting stronger and more flexible each month. I just felt nothing that would suggest that anything was wrong. In fact, I had never felt better. Of course, this doesn’t always mean that everything is fine, as you might not “feel” small volume metastatic cancer. But I just really didn’t think it was back. So I talked it over with my doctor, and we decided to just wait 2 months, and then repeat the tests to see what was there. I felt good about this plan. I didn’t want to panic, freak out, and go all the way to Guadalajara for another PET-CT, and cause myself a bunch of unnecessary stress if, in fact, everything was fine, and these were just benign findings, or false positives on these new images. I felt like my mind was clear, calm, and I could definitely wait 2 months. I mean, what’s the worst that could happen? I even though “this sure will be a test of my ability to remain equanimous in the face of stressful situations”! And as morbid as it sounds, we even said “well if the cancer is indeed back, waiting 2 months to start treatment won’t make any difference in the overall situation”. Ugh.

I started into the 2 months of follow up time feeling pretty good. I reminded myself that I had responded so well to chemo, achieving the “complete pathologic response”, which is a good prognostic sign. I reminded myself that the highest risk of recurrence is early in follow up, and that my PET-CT at 2 years had been fine. I felt pretty sure that everything was ok. Pretty sure. But not 100% sure. Eventually, little moments of fear started creeping in. I remembered that it had been a very aggressive and locally advanced cancer at diagnosis. Shit. I remembered patients I had known who had recurred 3 or more years after apparently being disase free. Double shit. Maybe I was just in denial, trying to tell myself that everything was ok? I started getting paranoid about little aches and pains (which I always have, and I relate to yoga or sleeping funny), fearing maybe they meant something bad was actually going on. And then my mind would just start to plummet into awful scenarios of recurrence, and what I would do, how would my loved ones react, etc. If you are a cancer survivor, you know what these fears feel like.

Fortunately, each time I started into one of these fear episodes, I was able to notice it. Awareness is the first step toward change, right? Body and thought awareness practices from yoga helped me to feel the fear swirling as it began.  Then I was able to engage my breath, or a mantra, to calm my mind. This allowed me to come back to the present moment. Was I ok in this very moment? Yes. So why allow fear of some unknown in the future to wreck my here and now? Might I find out some day in the future that my cancer has recurred? I guess so. But today is not that day. So I want to enjoy today to the fullest. I thought about non-attachment, contentment, and surrender (from the yamas and niyamas of the 8 limbs of yoga), and I was able to release my attachment to “knowing” I am free of cancer, to find contentment with the not knowing and with where I am today, and to surrender to the universe, to trust that whatever is meant to happen (even if that is cancer recurrence) is happening for a reason, and is part of my path and my journey. Fighting against it or freaking out about the possibility will not stop it from happening, and will just cause me misery in the meantime. It sounds a little crazy, and it isn’t always easy, but I really do believe that all of our struggles are here in our lives for a reason, to help us learn something or grow in some way. So whatever my life brings, I welcome it openly. In these ways, my yoga practice and yoga philosophy helped me immensely in the 2 months while I waited for my follow up.

The time finally came and I went for follow up in August. The lung nodule had disappeared (who knows what that was or if it was just the appearance of overlapping blood vessels that looked like a nodule), and the liver nodules were unchanged. The radiologist’s impression was that they are likely hemangiomas (benign vascular nodules), as they surely would have grown in the 2 month interval if they were cancerous. Also the follow up blood tests showed the liver tests were normal (probably abnormal previously due to dehydration or too many margaritas). Phew, the relief was immense. Of course, we still need additional follow up to be certain, and I’ll probably have the PET-CT this winter, but for now, it looks like I am cancer free. I’m back to feeling great, not worrying about little aches and pains after vigorous yoga practices, and not thinking about cancer recurrence too much.

Mark Twain said “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not the absence of fear”, and I think that is so true. As cancer survivors, and maybe just as humans, I think we are always going to have moments of fear here and there. There is no way to eliminate them completely. But through the practice of yoga (and I emphasize the word practice, because it truly is an ongoing effort, a practice), we can learn to resist, master, and overcome those fears one by one.

I know I am one of many who have had this kind of recurrence scare. I also know I am lucky to be, for now, cancer free. Some get the other kind of news when they go in for follow up. I wish courage, strength, and comfort for those survivors, as they traverse further tests and treatments.

I am grateful for every day. I am open to what each day brings, and I greet it with love instead of fear. I am courageous. I am a survivor.

 

 

 

 

Breathe!

Did you ever notice how powerful your breath is? We breathe mindlessly all day, and don’t usually think much about it, nor even notice it. But if we can learn conscious breathing, and really practice the techniques, we can harness the immense power of our breath. Your breath, when directed properly, has the power to calm and focus your mind, to relax your body, to ease pain (mental or physical), to release a negative energy/thought pattern, to balance the nervous system, and so much more! The science behind the breath is fascinating! And on the flip side, if you don’t know how to control it, shallow rapid breathing patterns can also have negative consequences, like increased stress, physical tension, and heart rate/blood pressure.

We breast cancer survivors can benefit so much from the power of the breath. From helping to calm our scanxiety after follow up imaging, to training our bodies to react to stressful situations in a healthier way, to easing physical pain leftover from breast cancer treatments, and others, the benefits are endless.  Learn to tune into and control your breath, and the benefits to your body and mind will amaze you.

If you have never looked into pranayama, or breath control practices, check it out! No gadgets necessary. Just you and your lungs!
Check out our tutorial video if you want to learn about pranayama, and start using the techniques.
Breathe deeply, my friends! 🧘🏼‍♀️🙏🏼🕉